


untitled

by Anonymous



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Abrupt Ending, a character study disguised as buildingsroman-lite, canonverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:13:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22249975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Jeno gives Mark a lot to think about.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Kudos: 26
Collections: Anonymous





	untitled

Mark is sitting cross-legged in a practice room, trying to work on some lyrics, except he has intractable writer’s block. He sighs, squinting at the page, where he’s written “Like Mona Lisa, you’re so enigmatic I can’t even begin to pretend to understand you” and winces. A soft “Hyung?” sounds from the doorway and interrupts his reverie.

Mark turns around and sees Jeno loitering by the door, looking slightly uncomfortable. Mark knows his disagreement with Donghyuck has put a strain on the group, as the other members delicately try to preserve their relationships with both of them without offending the other. Jeno’s mellow personality makes him especially dedicated to remaining a neutral presence, although Mark knows that deep down Jeno is closer to Donghyuck since they were born the same year.

“Hey, Jeno, what’s up?” Mark puts his best effort at sounding nonchalant, but he isn’t entirely convinced that he’s succeeded.

“I just wanted to, ah, review my rap with you,” Jeno musters unconvincingly. Mark narrows his eyes at Jeno, whose earnest personality makes it blatantly obvious when he’s lying. “Okay, never mind, I wanted to talk to you about Haechan,” he finally admits.

“I’ve already made it very clear I don’t want to talk about him,” Mark replies snippily, but guilt settles upon him at once. His anger is completely misplaced at Jeno. “Sorry, I just—”

“No apologies necessary,” Jeno says with an extra bright eyesmile as encouragement, “give me a couple of minutes to talk about Haechan and I’ll consider all forgiven.”

Ugh. Mark takes it all back that Jeno is earnest and honest. He’s actually a manipulative devil. Almost as much of a devil as—

“Fine,” Mark huffs. “Get on with what you came here to say.”

“What exactly happened?” Jeno asks.

Mark frowns. He’s not entirely sure how to answer the question. To everyone else, it probably seemed like such a small thing—a snarky offhand comment that Donghyuck was probably only 5% serious about, the type of comment Mark had brushed off again and again in the past and everyone figured would blow over—but for whatever reason, it was different that time.

“I’m not really sure how to put it.” Jeno looks at him encouragingly and nods anyway. “I think I just got tired, you know? Tired of the way he always casually makes fun of me with carefully crafted comments that feel like knives on my skin. Tired of how he never listens to me and always speaks informally to me. Tired of the way he gets in my personal space when I’ve told him a million times over that I feel uncomfortable.” He takes a shaky breath. “It feels almost like it means something, the relentless way he pursues hugs or kisses, but then I look around and he’s hugging or kissing someone or the other.”

Jeno hums in acknowledgement. “A lot of these concerns played into why you ‘hated’ him during our training period, no? What allowed you to overcome it then, but not now?”

Mark scratches his ear awkwardly. “He never takes anything seriously,” he says finally, which is a piss poor response. Jeno raises a perfect eyebrow. “You know, I don’t even know how we’ve gotten along in the past. We’re just so different, too different.”

“Let me just say first off that I’m not taking sides here, I’m simply a concerned friend to both of you who would like nothing better than the two of you to make amends. Are you okay with me providing my perspective on the situation?” Jeno looks at Mark seriously, and Mark shrugs. Jeno takes it as permission to begin.

“Like you’ve said, the two of you are very different people—but I think you’re only too different if you allow yourself to be. You, Mark, are earnest, serious, reserved. Haechan on the other hand is the consummate entertainer—he hides behind his twin masks of playfulness and wit, free-spirited nearly to a fault. On paper, it might be difficult to see how you’re similar at all. But I know the two of you have a strong passion for music that unites you, as well as a deep respect for each other’s approaches to life.”

“Now as for your specific concerns. I’ve always told him he should back off sooner when he teases you, but as you said, he doesn’t listen. It’s kind of the equivalent of a kindergarten boy pulling a girl’s pigtails to get her attention, but there you have it. It’s his dysfunctional way of getting your attention, getting a little bit of a rise out of you, almost flaunting how well he knows you by how well he can push your buttons. It’s also, believe it or not, one of the ways he likes to show affection.”

“As you’ve said, he doesn’t listen, and I’m with you there. It’s a character deficit that he could work on—he’s stubborn to the point of being insensible. I know you view how much he insists on speaking informally to you as a sign of disrespect towards you, but I think it’s more a sign of how desperately he wants to be considered close to you. And, quite frankly, you know it as well as I do, if we’re really talking about who is really the hyung it’s Haechan.”

“As for the personal space, I just want to make an observation that you might be sending mixed signals. Sometimes you’re seeking physical comfort from him, lying your head on his shoulder, other times you’re wriggling your way out of his hugs and kisses. I think what’s bothering you isn’t precisely that he gets into your personal space, but that you have opened up to him but he doesn’t seem to notice or take it seriously, to borrow your words again. After all, if he did take it seriously, why would he be hugging or kissing every member that comes by?”

“But this, too, is just how he shows affection. And everyone with eyes knows that even if he is hugging or kissing every member that comes by he has a soft spot for you, regards you differently than the others. He does care for you. He may not show it in words, but he does in actions, in the way during training he tried to keep you from overworking yourself or the way he cooked for you when you were trying to eat meat stock with rice.”

“I guess what I’m trying to say is, I think a lot of this misunderstanding has to do with the different ways that you express yourselves, and in the way you interpret those actions. This is just a suggestion, but I think it could be helpful if the two of you sat down to have an honest talk together, where you try to straightforwardly resolve these issues. Give him, and your friendship, the benefit of the doubt. Just think about it?” With that, Jeno gave Mark a quick pat on the back and left the room.

Figures Jeno would commit a hit and run. Mark had buried the lede, but it seemed that Jeno had caught on anyway. Mark felt overexposed, as Jeno had hit on a truth that Mark was hardly willing to acknowledge, let alone give thought to. It was true, though that they haven’t really tried to have a conversation, rather almost willfully misunderstanding each other’s intentions and twisting each other’s words. At any rate Jeno’s given him a lot to think about.

…almost too much to think about, really, given how unfocused he is on his writing.

Mark sighs.

Maybe it’s time to face the music.


End file.
